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kaotickarimi's journal
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zero is my hero, boyee |
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| connections [guardian] {ben's bargains} <babelfish> (mcsweeneys) |for all sinners| |
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| Mar. 30th, 2006 @ 08:27 pm arrival in minneapolis | |||
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mood:
to start...a pic of where i left and what i am thinking about: chippersong: NoArtist: KPFK - Southern California's 90.7FM News, Talk and Music. Stereo Stream  yesterday. arrived in minneapolis. exhausted. from the bus ride. i do not enjoy greyhound. it brings back bad memories of urine and shit smells from an overloaded bathroom in a bus ride i took in the 70s. i do not like American buses. the seats suck. bus travel has a different mentality as well. air travel, people, mostly stay in their little bubbles. don't take the time to meet one another. many times the flight is too quick for traveler relationships. on big flights, people meet, hang out. yet, there's a lot of sleeping. sleep is a good way to avoid meeting new people or encountering strangers. train travel is the most gregarious. everytime i get on a train, i want to meet everyone. it feels we are more open to meeting one another. we are on a long trip. there is a cafe. there is an observation car. there are points to meet one another. and...on a train, i can walk around. ah, yes...walking around. this ADD boy loves to walk around. that's why train travel seems more effortless, and planes and busses can be soooo boring for me. on a bus, it feels like everyone has their scowl on. i don't know why. are bus people just angry for being on a bus? are they nervous because if we pay cheaply for a bus, then we must be less than the air people and the train people? who are the bus people in the u.s.? are we all those that hate airplanes or can't afford it. are we like train people, storytellers, and like to languish in the time it takes to travel? or am i romanticizing travel? with the prices rising again in plane and train travel, i may be taking the bus more. and, if the bush administration gets its way, amtrak will no longer exist. i will continue this exploration of the difference between bus, air, and train people. i don't want to get into car people. that's a whole series of entries. more about my arrival in april, that's next week. peace. |
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| Dec. 6th, 2005 @ 12:57 am popularity breeds contempt, well, not really, it can foster joy! | |||
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mood:
This last weekend was amazing.  creativesong: sister christian by night ranger I learned so much about the beauty of serendipity. I started by reading Beau Sia's journal on www.beausia.com. He had gone to a Neil Diamond concert and marvelled about how Niel could get an intergenerational crowd to shake their ass and enjoy theirselves. I, too, witness the same marvel but through the lens of two different performers. First, I wrote an article about Deep Dish for the latest issue of Namak. It was an experiment. A crazy experiment. a poetry piece and interview combined. last time i wrote a poem for a publication was Selena's obituary. cool thing was i won an award for that piece. it's what poets are good for: obituaries. inaugurations. moments where romanticization leads to seeds of the imagination, of hope, of goodness. ah, poets... so i was unsure how deep dish and a magazine audience were going to take it. i haven't heard from people about it, negative or positive, but i had fun writing it. i called ali from deep dish to say happy turkey day, and he said why don't you come down and say it to us in person. they were playing at the club sound bar in chicago, which i thought i had never been to before. until i got there, i realized i had. it was amazing they had 1000s of people dancing to their rhythm. people were entranced by the moment of the music. this was the disco church of my dreams. a place where people come to worship with their bodies, submitting to the music that brings them joy. for some, as with all churches, this may be escape, but when you have two shamans who know how to keep the flow going, it's amazing. many dj friends tell me that it is easy to mix, blend, etc, but i often wonder why is it that certain DJs can rock a party even when people are not in the mood to be rocked. they can change the pace. they switch the energy flow of the room because they have the skill, natural or rehearsed, to feel out a room and take control. how many poets and performers can say they do that? it requires an openness and courage that deep dish unabashedly has. there is no fear in their performance. there is no second guessing. they just go for it, and they and the crowd become one. which goes into the second part of last weekend: poi dog pondering. if you don't know them, go to their website. i had only seen them in concert once before. my friend sarah was the one who introduce me to them, and i was intrigued by their music. it's house music that meet rock in a way. it's spirutal music that has no description. no box. when i first saw them live in boonie suburbia of palatine, i was blown away at the theatrics their lead singer, frank orrall used. and again, the church metaphor. people were hungry for them. i couldn't believe it. they needed their fix of poi dog. not like a rocker who needs to rock hard, but like a wounded soul that needs a doctor. now i don't know if these people would see it this way, but talking with poi dog fans, i can't help but see the similarities. the main reason i went because frank is an amazing dj, too. he spins in chicago and spins music that totally moves me, like D Double. it's as if we walked the same halls, the same clubs, the same time. we both seekers. when i went to his dj gig, he told me about the gig at double door. this man is very cool. he carries his spirit well. not many people i can say that. back to the concert last saturday...he is like a preacher/conductor. the whole group. they are one with the crowd. so many people told me it was their 6th or 7th time going to a poi dog concert. it was like the grateful dead or something. how many times have you been to see poi dog robert? i felt bad answering. i couldn't name my favorite poi dog. i was just there because the lead singer is great guy and the spirit of their music moves me. that's what i wanted to say, but instead they were at a revival and who was i to ruin it for them. the interesting thing about this revival, thought, is i don't think these people are taking off their clothes. they are a bit too restrained. but maybe if poi dog does an outdoor concert in the summer, maybe in the fervor of joy, people will undress. who knows? i beleive they are cantors in pop music. they are people who move me like the sabzi brothers did a few years back when i saw them like googoosh at oakland coliseum. there are voices, language, in combination that take us to a memory, an experience, and intersect past and present in such a way that the fission is a type of ecstasy. does this make sense. i think i have been to very few poetry readings that do this. for a huge audience. i wonder how much marketing has to do with a crowd's openness, though. will they be more open to a band or musician if they heard they were dope? who knows? thoughts anyone? all i know there are voices in poetry that take me away just like music. and i feel blessed when i am witness to magic, or even swept away. isn't that the definition of ecstasy in the first place? |
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| Nov. 23rd, 2005 @ 11:43 pm fremont, cali is famous... | |||
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mood: accomplished
ah...this one is for all those folks that have to defend their asian manhood, or their bay suburbanness...or for those that wanna just get their man to be a better lover...song: Eternal Flame by The Bangles penis envy? but isn't it about pushing, more than pulling...i don't know, your thoughts? happy thanks taking! karimi |
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| Sep. 21st, 2005 @ 10:56 pm if you got ADD, holla! why recipe books hate you and i love you | |||
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mood:
 fullsong: Souldier by B-Side Players  i am starting to dislike recipe books. the more i read them, i realize i put them in the same regard as computer books. you know, the how to books. i don't like computer how to books. i don't like reading them word for word, cover to cover, except for David Pogue's books. Books by David Pogue rock. the reason: instructions. i have to follow them. step by step. i want to just do the thing i am doing. i want to just get in and do it. i don't want to know that something is going to take 3 hours at the end of a recipe. tell me everything ahead of time. at the beginning. a lot of this has to do with design of a cookbook and the sad nature of time's role in our lives. not that i want to cook everything fast, but most of these recipes take 2-3 hours. and with the way i cut and do things, add another hour. these recipes take prep work. a lot of prep work. the interesting thing is that restaurants streamline this prep work by having things ready two or three days ahead because they know what they are going to cook. i will have to do the same thing. preparing for the preparation. not because i am trying to be the quickest. it is more that I am trying to be efficient. Not waste time, so I can attend to the most important part of the meal: connecting with people at the table. but now...i am thinking what is also cool...is cooking with people. not just eating the food. watching the preparation, being part of it. i wish i had a bigger kitchen so 3 or 4 people could cook with me, then we could talk and discuss and then when people come to eat, we talk with them, and then 3 or 4 people clean up. different people, so they can have the shared experience. it goes quicker, and LESS WORK FOR ME (kidding, really i am kidding..sheesh.) here are the pics: (for all 19 good and bad photos of these creations, check out the pics here  i started with my trusty alaskan ulu. WHICH KICKS ASS!!! ALASKA, HOLLA! i then cut so many vegetable, onions, etc.  i made dolmeh and gormeh sabzi. i want to make sabzi that is vegetarian/vegan more because the best thing about sabzi for me is not the meat, it's the sabzi! (i hope sabzi in seattle gets his head too big after that comment!) but it's true...the meat ruined it for monday's recipe. it was too tough. the meat needs to be super tender to go with the flow of the vegetables.also...i screwed up. i thought dolmeh took an hour and boom! nope after you wrap them they take another 1.5-2 hours to unvinegar. but again...I MADE TADIK. no saffron, just dill. WHAT, WHAT. what you know about that sabzi??! RECOGNIZE. I wonder how many young Iranians cook (?) for themselves these dishes. I wonder how many of us take the time to cook. It's a ritual. No doubt, but it's one we omit from our lives. Cooking together, eating together.Cooking changes how I am eating. My relationship to my food, and even...my relationship to my family. I think about the pressure my mother must have felt trying to cook a dish she never ate before for a man who had eaten this stuff all his life with a book whose recipes were poorly translated. Again, I really am not recommending either book I am using, but when I am done with this process, I think I want to make my own book for kids with ADD like me. ONE BIG TIP: when making sabzi, and dolmeh, cut all the vegetables together, put them in bowls, and make the rice you need the night before. trader joes yogurt sucks!!!!!!!!! MONDAY: VEGETARIANS IN THE HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE YOU AT??!?!!? i started this entry with this song: "war is hell when will it end when will people start gettin' together again" What's Happenin Brother - Marvin Gaye ah...and ended with Souldier by B-Side Players living in the most fucked up times...you're a souldier fighting to keep your soul aiive... what is my itunes telling me? what are you doing today to evolve your soul or your world? |
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| Sep. 18th, 2005 @ 10:21 pm digging through crates of poetry | |||
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mood:
old poem. written five years ago. drainedsong: theme from pink panther by judas priest took it out of the vault for the livejournal eyes to give their nays and ayes. hope you are having a peaceful day. the poet who writes about diallo is not diallo (inspired by Rene Magritte) by robert karimi the poet who writes about diallo is not diallo. the poet who writes about diallo makes me imagine metaphoric equivalent of police gunfire onomatopoetic gunshots of words that are ended by periods not by bullets. the poet who writes about diallo can say the number 41 repeat it over and over again like it was a prayer like it was a chant to make diallo jesus to transform the 41 into triple 6 to those that worship hiphop culture like a jehovah’s witness. the poet who writes about diallo can fill me with hate make me want to sing write metaphors that strangle police paratroopers who are more stormtrooper than human where i write pages and pages to double and triple the pain of the families through my writer’s calluses until i struggle to see how my life connects with a west african man who was reaching for his wallet like my father would when the shah’s angry soldiers would growl against any iranian with even a hint of revolution in their gait or a young mexican boy does as he slowly reaches over to his glove compartment and guilty flashlights and assumption-filled guns point at his heart beating. beating. beating. in humility: yes officer sir yes officer sir yes.. please. here is my identity. please don’t... or would i would we not be given a chance like he like him like Diallo who i am not because the poet who writes about diallo is not diallo. diallo cannot speak anymore for himself. 6/24/00 6/28/00 |
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| Sep. 17th, 2005 @ 12:37 pm celso piña and the lesson of shaking hands. | |||
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mood:
i went to an amazing concert last night. curioussong: Dreaming Or The Jungle by Depth Charge lila downs, celso piña....it was mexican independence day last night, and the world music festival (which rocks!) had this amazing concert at millenium park featuring mariachis and downs and piña...  celso piña who is in his late 40s, and has performed for over 20 years is finally getting his due. when he came out last night, i didn't know if he was greeting his family or acting like a politician. he shook everyone's hand in the crowd. he would take moments within in the music to run across the stage and just shake everyone's hand. it was awesome. he could have been grooving, just doing his thang, but it was so important to him, and he would voraciously shake people's hands. it wasn't a "cool, i'm a star". it really looked like he wanted to shake everyone's hand. say hello to everyone. like they came to his house to hear him. it was such a beautiful and simple way to connect with everyone. i like it when people on huge stages do this. when rappers go out, or punk rock band dive into an audience...well the dive is not the same...nor singing the crowd...even though, it's cool... what is really cool is when then just come by and say hello. shake your hand... not everyone can do this...and it won't work with every band, but with celso piña, it was perfect. especially because it did not feel like he was doing it just as a performance shtick. |
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| Sep. 16th, 2005 @ 05:25 pm guatemalan independence day! | |||
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mood:
if you didn't know...pensivesong: Bushleaguer by Pearl Jam yesterday was guatemalan independence day. HAPPY GUATEMALAN INDEPENDENCE DAY! VIVA GUATEMALA and i heard the word guatemala more than 50 times in a span of 20 minutes. At first, I thought it was because it was Guatemala independence day, but, no... it was survivor in guatemala! i have been thinking a lot about guatemala lately. not just because of survivor, but because i am becoming fascinated with what creates causes de jours. i remember in the mid 80s when guatemala was the left's cause du jour. there were so many people that cared about guatemala's poor, and the oppressive government there. now...who cares about guatemala? who cares about afghanistan now? what about el salvador? bosnia? serbia? somalia? rwanda? eritreia, the tsunami victims?what about the l.a. riots/uprising of 92? (most people outside of los angeles really don't even know what i am talking about) what day will we stop thinking about the issues that we are all thinking about with katrina? and the people of new orleans? hmmm...things haven't changed in guatemala...still poor people, still a military centered government...hmm...what creates causes de jours, and what gets rid of them? why do we forget so quickly? or maybe we just have to move Survivor to the places where we want america to focus on...hmmm?but i know i am being silly because Survivor doesn't make people focus on the area, it just exoticizes even more, but how can we not lose energy that crisises create, so that people do not lose sight of the issues that need remedying that these crisises bring up? just thinking aloud? thoughts? (btw...today is mexican independence day, too!! viva mexico!) |
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| Sep. 12th, 2005 @ 08:43 am day 2 - gormeh sabzi | |||
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mood:
good news!  bouncysong: Daytrippin by Poi Dog Pondering atomicshogun's website is up, check it out! it rocks!bad news. today will be not be a cooking day. :( good news: the next public food day will be the 19th. I will be cooking gormeh sabzi!!!! bad news: the two recipes in the books are very different. mom says that ingredients translated in english are not what they are supposed to be, at least that's what my dad told her. day 2. i just finished the last of the rice from thursday. so here are the public dinners schedule: monday sept. 19th (gormeh sabzi) all dinners at 7pm. food served at around 7:30ish. your job: to eat, enjoy, converse, help me taste my recipes you can bring salads or more food, or if you want a donation, but not necessary limit 10 people. if you are the after 10th person, you can still come, but you need to bring a dish. some people have asked why i am doing this. if you haven't read the journal: this is for a performance i am working on called Cooking con Karimi. Part of the show requires that I cook live. But the most important part...is that the show is about how we need to build community and how we need to come together, and homemade food and dinner together is a way we can find peace with one another in a time of war. our society is filled with weapons of mass consumption: mcdonalds, white castle, etc. where food is quick, relationships are quick, no communication during eating. eating is losing its ritual and its ceremony. we need to bring it back. as someone has told me the line between the character mero cocinero and me is sometimes a very fine line that I cross a lot because some of these food issues are my issues, too. hope you can join me at least once in the next few months. |
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| Sep. 11th, 2005 @ 01:45 am Mom, mom, mom...and Vonnegut! | |||
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mood:
Due to mom intervention...i have to postpone sunday's dinner. She thinks the books I am using may not be giving me correct info. So Monday will be dinner. RSVP now. 10 person limit.artisticsong: These are the Days of Our Lives (Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert) by George Michael & Lisa Stansfiel Meanwhile, awesome quotation from my favorite author to ponder for 9/11, I'll have more tomorrow as I reflect on 9/11, Katrina, and the power of composing music. "Anybody practicing the fine art of composing music, no matter how cynical or greedy or scared, still can’t help serving all humanity. Music makes practically everybody fonder of life than he or she would be without it. Even military bands, although I am a pacifist, always cheer me up. But that is the power of ear candy. The creation of such a universal confection for the eye, by means of printed poetry or fiction or history or essays or memoirs and so on, isn’t possible. Literature is by definition opinionated. It is bound to provoke the arguments in many quarters, not excluding the hometown or even the family of the author. Any ink-on-paper author can only hope at best to seem responsible to small groups or like-minded people somewhere. He or she might as well have given an interview to the editor of a small-circulation publication." --Kurt Vonnegut |
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| Sep. 9th, 2005 @ 09:09 am day 1 complete. tadik! | |||
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mood:
it was a lot of work, but day 1 is complete. with pictures! exanimatesong: Les Professionels by Air yesterday's recipe: joojeh kebab and persian rice. so...as i knew it would be: the rice was the bear. the rice takes over an hour to cook, if done right. and i wanted to do it right. the first thing i am noticing though, is that the book i am using, uses a lot of salt and oil. one of my father's criticism when we would go out to persian food is that it was too oily. this idea hit me as i was putting 1 cup of oil in the rice, and 4 tbsp of salt in it. It's what the recipe required!!! the other thing i realized is THE RIGHT TOOLS ARE NECESSARY. i don't have a fine enough strainer (for rice) and i don't have those cool cake spatulas. i am off to the thrift store after i write this. BUT....to cut to the chase I MADE TADIK!!!!!!! I MADE IT!!!!! WOO-HOOOO!!!! WOO-HOO!!!!!  the prep starts off with washing the rice 5 times, soaking it for at least 2 hours (with 2 tbsp of salt!) then then cooking it for 6-10 minutes, boiling the water in the pot before putting the rice in. (this is a new idea for me, i usually boil rice and water together) now...after this, you create a mix of yogurt, saffron water, butter, and 3 spatulas of rice to make the tadik part of the rice. then put the rest of the rice in a pyramid.  if you want to hear about the rest, email me. here are the rest of the pics. my guests were pleased. and overall i was happy with the food, except the kebabs with wooden kebabs does not work on a really hot grill. also, the rice was a little sticky still and too salty! the best thing about cooking is the evolution of the cook!! final menu: joojeh kebab non kebab more joojeh, persian rice with saffron and tadik!, plain yogurt, grilled onions, mushrooms, and tomatoes, and negra modelo (national beer of all iranian guatemalans)!    btw...my yogurt sucked! if it ain't tangy, i won't eat it. mountain high rocks! big thank you to roberto and wayne for trying the food and bringing the beer! as always with every dinner i have hosted, the conversation is always better than the food, and the food...is pretty darn tootin good! next cooking day: sunday! |
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| Sep. 8th, 2005 @ 09:32 am day 1 - FREE FOOD!!! | |||
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mood:
this is day 1 of the cooking con karimi project.contemplativesong: The Drama You've Been Craving by Sleater-Kinney meaning...day 1 of the process of developing the show, and developing myself as cook and cultural cocinero. yes, the show and idea have been around for 8 years, but now it's time for some fine tweaking... my mother has given me 3 iranian cookbooks to begin this journey. her charge: to look at all of them and see how each recipe is different. my goal: to make amazing tadik consistently just like my father. there are things i love about my parent's culture. i love persian and guatemalan cuisine. i love especially tadik. it is up there with doogh. oh yes!!! tadik! and as a former only child, i never had to fight for it. i always got as much as i wanted. but i can never make it correctly. my father says because i never have the right equipment. so i am on the hunt for a good pot. one that has a deep thick bottom. (that sounds bad, but..) the cheap shit i have been buying doesn't allow for the crust to come o ut right. well...tonight! i will be serving an iranian meal. open to anyone who sees this. help me with my quest. day 1 of cooking iranian food from these books my mother gave me. i will be cooking almost a new recipe everyday, trying to perfect my tadik and other things. and posting up observations about each recipe. this is a way of getting to know my father, my mother, my self. i am excited. woo-hoo!! so recipe #1: joojeh kabob, rice, tadik, and...grilled tomatoes and ... if you want to bring salad or beverage, i will not stop you. or anything to grill...cause i will have the grill going... i only have enough food for 10 people, so let me know soon. but if you bring more stuff to grill we can have as many people. dinner at 7pm. be there. if you are coming...email me, or at least call! there will be dinners throughout the month. yes, FREE FOOD. in the spirit of mero cocinero karimi: "the revolution starts in the kitchen!" last night i prepared the marinade. i painstakingly squeezed around 20-30 limes (tiny limes) to make this marinade. every time i cook i realize my mother's gadgets are necessary...like juice squeezer tool thingy. very important. you never think of buying it because how many times do you squeeze for juice. we should squeeze our own juic much more. juice is one of those things we take for granted on a daily basis. and one of those things that has been fortified and changed so much to go with the food trends that have occured. here is the marinade mix. it has saffrom, garlic, lime juice, and plain yogurt.  next i washed the chicken, then dunked and put in the mix to marinade overnight!   |
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| Sep. 7th, 2005 @ 12:12 pm i did it!! | |||
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mood:
i have finally done it. awakesong: Canned Heat: Going Up The Country shawn gave us all an assignment at the eclectic kaos group performance on august 28th: smile at people. between 100-200. and today i have smiled at my 200th person. yep, i counted. it took my a little more than a week, and i have learned a lot about myself and others through this. 1. smiles catch people off guard. if you came up to someone with a fist and said, "GIVE ME YOUR MONEY, MOTHERFUCKER!" they would be used to that. expect that. but if you smile at them...whoa. i got crazy responses from people. some people wereso off guard, they would get nervous to smile back at me. one elderly man beamed when i smiled at him. it was like no one smiled at him for the last ten years or something. 2. people's perception of me greatly effects how they smile back at me. this one was not a real eye opener. but you can see how people see you, if you smile at them, and they don't smile back. but also, it's a REAL interaction. you can tell when people are faking their smile, and they can tell if yours if fake, too. which leads to... 3. it's real difficult to sincerely smile at every person you see. main reason: maybe i am thinking of hurricane katrina, or the bills i have to pay, aor family issues and then someone comes into my sight, i may not be in the mood to smile at them. and it sucks to smile at someone just because some performance artist gave you an assignment, true? 4. women smile less at me than men. women really were trippy to smile at because so many would not look at me, or were wondering what was the ulterior motive behind my smile. i don't know if it was because of socialization of the smile, that a smile can be an invitation to flirtation or my smile is leering. LOL...anyone who responds in this journal with my smile is leering is WHACK. 5. i only smile at ladies. i don't smile enough at men. i am so used to smiling at all women, and never at dudes. 6. men smile and say what's up. i usually, just give the "man's nod": what up?. you know, that macho head nod bullshit. why don't men smile at each other? we need to. i think it's connection to lack of intimacy with each other. this experience has taught me that we don't have enough non-sexual encounters with each other. granted there's a lot of non-sex in my life, but that's not what i mean. i mean we need to have intimate encounters with each other, and when i say intimate i don't mean take off our clothes, i mean have experiences with each other that are beyond superficial exchanges. take time with each other to look in each other's faces, without alcohol and drugs, and just listen, work, vibe. 7. smiles make people's day. 8. i don't smile enough. i walk around with stern face on the street. true i do have the only child tendency to laugh at my own jokes at random moments, so that when i walk across the street, people think i am a raving lunatic, but it feels good to randomly laugh. it feels good to smile at people, but i don't do both enough. it's especially hard after hurrican katrina, but... 9. i interacted with more people on a daily basis. these interactions felt very real for the moment. 10. laughter = authentic moment. you can't fake a laugh, and you can't fake a smile. i had the word authentic, it's very loaded, but when you connect smiles with someone or someone truly feels something funny, there's a very intimate connection that is priceless. your turn. try it. smile at 100-200 people, let me know how it goes. try to give real smiles, not some fake shit, or coquettish flirting...but if you want to flirt with 100-200 people, go for that tambien. |
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| Jul. 5th, 2005 @ 06:28 am a poem for a belated fourth of july | |||
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mood:
a small poem...if you want to print it out because you don't read long stuff well on the net, go to www.kaoticgood.comrestlesssong: Heartland by The The it's a bit preachy, but it's what the speech itself hit me with...all comments accepted. Upon reading Howard Zinn’s graduation speech to Spellman College, “Against Discouragement” (a humble remix) by robert karimi our nation. at war. war, after war after war after war, the empire expands. spread like a tree that kills its neighbors in the forest, sucking out all their nutrients, their roots decay to an unnatural death. we spend trillions to destroy people, history, memory instead of clean water, give free medicine, cure disease to help people live. although the body politic of our nation is about to be consumed by this republican herbicide, we should not commit communal suicide. there is a new hope. daily. even with liberals in office in the 1960s, politicians played politics permitted the oppression of people by the amount of their melanin, it was the people who picketed, demonstrated, cried, fought for cambio! CHANGE! CAMBIO! even with liberals, even with Camelot, dead young Americans flew home from Vietnam in black body bags draped with an empty flag again, the people’s voices vaulted, exalted in parks, fighters burnt their draft cards and sang for peace. it was not an idyllic time. a better time. it was not a surreal, non real time. it was human time, an oppressive time. a time of innocence lost with the bloody hands of guilt still fresh from hiroshima, tehran, and guatemala city. these were not happy days. hheeey! fonzi was created in the 70s. the lesson of history is that we must not despair. must. not. be discouraged. lies circle us and may drown us. do not be discouraged. truth is powerful, fluid and unbreakable. lies manifest into artificial creations called nations, blind devotion to a notion as immobile as this. ludicrous. no one owns a monopoly on morality. our nation’s excursions abroad are versions of hostile takeovers, not democracy and liberty. spreading their imperialistic religion by the sword. in indigenous lands, mexico, cuba, phillipines, guatemala, iraq y mas y mas as baba poet langston said, “we are nymphomaniacs of power.” even though it seems there is no prophylactic to stop the U.S. sexually transmitted democracy, do not be discouraged. we have poets. we have artists. do not be discouraged. listen: do you hear their songs? their metaphors and symbols used to give us second sight? see the visions in the dark and light of their canvas, streetcorner, zine, video, mural, web site? do not be discouraged. death tolls multiply as wars multiply, dividing like cancerous cells at a torrid pace, poisoning soldiers’ minds into demonization for an unholy cause, poisoning a soul of a nation into an artificial aberration. whatever we may hear, read, witness, even if we see the numbers of dead in Iraq multiply to the tens of thousands overnight, even if the cancer spreads to Iran, N.Korea, or Indonesia, or all the supreme court justices have their left wings cut by the right hand of Born Again Texan Christian God and given synthetic haliburton eyes or jeb bush wins the white house in 2008, do not be discouraged. we must demand that our children live cancer free in peace, teach our children how to fly, that one wing makes for a looney bird, or at best, one that cannot fly, only crash into the dust. teach our children that humans are not demons nor angels, we are not numbers to be divided, we are alive. we live with a beautiful god inside of us of our own creation, and the joy of life is discovering each other’s holiness. going beyond the melanin, nationhood, and other artificial creations that keep us blind from truly saying tu eres mi otro yo tu eres mi otro yo in lak esh i and thou yo y tu y yo y tu y yo y tu y yo y tu y yo y tu y tu y tu y yo: we cannot be discouraged. we must listen to the voice of our soul, trust the direct dissonance we feel when the rules are unjust. act out our courage for peace and justice. if we see a sign that says: “young ladies or young men who can picket, please sign below.” sign. but do not let it be our only signature of who we are on this earth. our arms, feet, should dance into an act of our own creation. we do not have to block a freeway or commit suicide in order to leave our mark that we are for justice. we are for love. we are for peace. do something. let the somethings multiply and multiply so we become the antivirus, the antidote unifying so that the tree of our nation, our community does not die in vain. ready? let’s get on our toes, together. it is time for us to speak again. do not be discouraged. weeeeee... 6/5/05; 6/12/05; 7/4/05 |
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| Jul. 3rd, 2005 @ 03:06 am what the???!!!!! | |||
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mood:
what is sad about the United States? Comments? annoyedsong: Salsoul Orchestra: It's Good For Soul (Original Walter Gibbons 12" Mix) |
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| Jul. 2nd, 2005 @ 04:33 pm luther vandross has passed... | |||
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mood:
pensivesong: change: the glow of love  very bummed. luther vandross is that period of my life where i discovered girls, discovered the power of words. his poetics, his voice is always in my mind....even when i create stuff. it's a very sad day to learn that he passed. this is up there with phil hartman passing for me. yes, he's a stranger, but his words, his music are like family to me.if you get a chance listen to his work with Change. or even his older albums..he showed he could be a balladeer and a house diva all at once. it's a trip i didn't realize how many covers he did, and how he redefined them, bringing a depth and profound flow to past songs as if the songs were made for him. and i bet the audiences who loved him had no idea he was redoing burt bacharach and the carpenters. sadly, all my luther CDs have been stolen...i just hope there are not tons of tribute albums with people singing his stuff...i would prefer that DJs turn them into new remixes...his voice is truly unique...like Marvin Gaye or Stevie Wonder, any imitation would be like the fake salmon they sell in the lower 48. "don't you remember you told me you loved me baby..." i will be dancing to the "glow of love" for awhile. this will be my prayer for him. |
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| Jul. 1st, 2005 @ 07:24 am war of the worlds... | |||
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mood:
sucked. ok...it was not great. it was pretty bad. definitely a DVD rental when you get the 2 for 1 deal from your local video store. sleepysong: The Bee Gees: Jive Talkin' just saw it here in Anchorage. it was quite interesting in the way that it happened in New York. It's so hard to watch an apocalyptic film that takes place in NYC and not think about if it is attempting to connect things to 9/11. how people walked across the bridges out of town in WOTW, and some of the other things, made me think that Spielberg was attempting to draw some parallels. I was wondering my entire time I was watching, how does someone in Anchorage care about something happening in New York City. It's soooo far away. The aliens didn't go to Anchorage in WOTW. They went to NYC and Chicago. Anchorage was safe. They were not bothering anybody. And how does the idea of alien play itself out here? Since they are far away from the Lower 48, can images about the Other be easily manufactured and marketed here than other places? Or is there a "I don't give a shit either way" attitude? Is this a manufactured discussion in my head that folks here don't care about? Hmm...need to investigate. The other surprise in the movie: Danny Hoch as NYC cop. Is this the future for all performance artists? Bit roles in Spielberg movies? Is Astrid Haddad going to be in the next Salma Hayek film as her godmother? Maybe Elia Arce will play a Costa Rican immigrant who works for a social service agency in L.A.? day 4 of the workshop. the student participants amaze me on how they synthesize things. i am catalyzed by there responses. constantly thinking on how to build of their ideas, walls, or successes. this process is amazing because it is reality without claiming to "be real." i am so glad none of them are putting up pretentiousness to be cool with the chicago artists. i think they are great storytellers who need to just believe in themselves more. when they do, they fly... i think i am learning what makes me fly as artist and facilitator here as well. sometimes the idea of going with the flow, and letting the moment carry you can be really freeing. i am learning a lot about collaboration with Rivka, and i think i will do a workshop or something for artists who collaborate. This has been one of the best collaborations I have had. I forgot to write about the Iranian elections in the last post. My friend Danny Postel has been sending me articles everyday about it, so I am reading so much that haven't had time to synthesize all the content. The one that has been hitting me is the comparison made in Iranian.com to the way the conservatives in Iran solidified the lower classes to vote for them in the same way Reagan and Bush did in the 80s. Take Back America = Take Back Iran. I will find the link and put it together. As half-iranian boy that i am I have often been advised by my whole iranian friends to watch out about how i discuss politics because Iranians here in this country may not come to a poetry reading or may distance themselves from me because of the way i view things in Iran. This has upset me a lot. It's censorship, but...it's also cultural sensitivity. 1979 for Iranians is like the late 50s for Cubans. Some folks never forget. And they pass their politics as heritage to their children and grandchildren. Politics is personal. Even when people try and distance themselves from politics, it's personal. But now is the time to discuss and articulate an idea about Iranian politics, just like U.S. politics. Now is the time for me and others to pay attention to Iran and the U.S. Or else other factions, primarily the Right from the U.S. and Iran is going to define the relationship in such a rigid way that we will not have room to articulate a different vision. It's kind of like what happened with Cuba and the U.S. The Right here has set up this rigid bloickade physically and politically between the U.S. and Cuba, and Castro has played a long and become a conservative, even ultra-conservative figure in his own country. How does a revolutionary allow a revolution to evolve? How can a leader take there ego out of the revolution or do we always need a figurehead to establish/define what is the heart of the people? Can revolution evolve? And if it goes back to pre-revolutionary days by the will of the people, has the revolution failed? More questions...more questions... |
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| Jun. 30th, 2005 @ 11:08 am iranian election - day 3 alaska | |||
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mood:
day 3 in alaska...awakesong: Barry White: Can't Get Enough Of Your Love, Babe it has been a trip getting used to the sunlight. i took a long walk on day 2 from where we are staying to downtown Anchorage. it was 1 am and the sun was still out in a dusky fashion. it was like the sun did not want to go down. it was revolting against nature. or it was like a little boy in the summer telling it's parents, "No, I still want to play! I want to play!" Sadly, downtown Anchorage is pretty desolate at around 2am. Lot of drunk people just trying to get home. I thought everyone would be out and about going to restaurants, etc. But it is like the Bay Area, everything closes. That's what sucks about the West Coast as a whole, everything closes down early. I never understand how this idea of outside culture closing so early fits in with the West Coast mentality. Are we Puritans by nature or are we just children of the sun, that we are too concerned about being awake in the sunlight, that we have no love for the moon. It's just sad that a place has almost 24 hours of sunlight and there are no 24 hour cafes, and only Denny's as there main 24 hours restaurant. Are things here that proletariat? That Christian? Gene (Co-director of Out North) tells stories of when the bars would close at 4am, and people would go outside to watch the sunrise, just chill. When things were a bit more loose. Now, things here are not loose at all. It feels very rigid, but rigid in a way where everyone wants to be wild. This is not Colorado, where I feel a militaristic regimen of health: "We've GOT TO YOGA! NOW ONE AND TWO! DAMMIT!" Here there is a free spirit. A wild, we don't give a shit attitude. Kinda like Texas, the other state in the Union that still thinks it's its own country. Here in Alaska, the people hike, camp, drink, smoke, fish as part of life here. They have to really withstand the elements. This creates a roughness that I have not encountered before. Not an asshole attitude. I have to explore more to articulate it. This is an incomplete thought. Don't hold me accountable quite yet. I hope to get to know more people and talk with them. I have more to write about how the workshop is going, but I think it may be later. peace... |
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| Jun. 26th, 2005 @ 10:40 am transformation and dissonance | |||
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mood:
 quixoticsong: Ca Plane pour moi by Plastic Bertrand  today marks the beginning of a new chapter. i have shaved my hair again. the last time i did this was 8/2001. 4 years ago i made a commitment to myself to follow my heart's voice. i am still following it, but it has been muddled. it is time for another transformation. another reflection. i am heading to alaska for 6 weeks to facilitate/direct a workshop with young people for 3 of the 6. i am going to now reflect what is going on around me and what my role in it is. take notice. i ask if everyone do the same. you don't have to shed your hair... The U.S. relations with Iran are really affecting me artistically, and am getting angry that we may have another war because Washington is seeking another target for its spin machine in order to maintain power. This isn't even about oil. It's about consolidating power here in the U.S. All the language is being created in the media to rationalize another war. Just check out the language in the recent AP article about the elections. Aren't conservatives in power here in the U.S.? They right wing here is just like Iran's government in that they are not hiding behind compassionate conservatism. They are in power and doing whatever they want. And didn't we have left winger and progressive people boycott our election, too? This is much more complicated than I have time for, but think of this...the hardline conservatives of a party won an election by a landslide, the country's supreme court affected the election, and the ruling party has a horrible human rights record and sees other countries in the "you are either against us or with us" mentality. and the left's response in the country is to boycott the election so the right wing gets stronger. sound familiar? (one of the differences is that Iran is publicly arresting and jailing (and killing its opponents), but this is very complicated. this is the time for us to read, write, question, and talk with one another from all wings. if we only respect one wing of a country, we then will never fly to our true potential. And now check today's headline in AP... |
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| Jun. 25th, 2005 @ 05:08 pm stats I learned in MN today | |||
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mood:
$79 million - the amount the average G-rated movie earned between 1989 and 2003artisticsong: Out of the Window by Violent Femmes 11 - the number of times more profitable a G-rated movie is than an R-rated film. 12 - the number of times more likely that the film industry is to make an R-rated movie than a G-rated movie. source: the Minneapolis Star Tribune via the Dove Foundation What does this mean? |
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| Mar. 11th, 2005 @ 07:18 pm invitation to self(the remix) and reports on day 1 | |||
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song: Breakestra: I got love
last night was our first performance in chicago. the crowd was amazing. they were following me on every word. it was cool to hear people singing and laughing. it felt like they were going on an emotional rollercoaster with me. one of the best moments: a young boy: diego, maybe he was 7 or 10, he was young...came up to me and asked me to teach him some moves. throughout the show he wanted to dance with me. it was so cool. he reminded me of young me. full of energy and life. i was so glad he and his family came. they said they saw the article in the chicago reader, and that's why they came.which reminds me...WE GOT CRITIC'S CHOICE in the Chicago Reader!! the article: http://www.chicagoreader.com/. all my performer friends have already prepared me on how to deal with critics, but it's nice to get a positive one instead of a bad one or none. more later on this...but i am inviting all of the LJ world to our show March 12 and 13th before we go to Alaska here's the info: self (the remix) March 12 and 13 Saturday at 7pm Sunday at 3pm at the hothouse, 31 e. balbo, chicago (www.hothouse.net to order tickets) Tickets: $15/$10; $10/5 students/members explanation of the show: go to www.kaoticgood.com/self.html  |
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